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I Fought the Law I Fought the Law
Originally intended to be a simple Christmas humour book, I Fought The Law ended up becoming something rather different. The premise was simple enough. Dan was going to spend a year trying to break as many stupid old laws as he could find, for your amusement. You see there are loads of ridiculous laws on the statute book...It is still illegal to beat a carpet in the Metropolitan Police District, to take possession of a beached whale or to get within a hundred yards of the Queen without wearing socks. The list goes on and on. But in the process of researching these silly old laws Dan found a glut of stupid legislation that was equally ridiculous, but these laws had one thing in common - they'd all been passed by our current Government. And when he met a man who has a criminal record for eating a cake that had 'Freedom of Speech' written on it in icing in Parliament Square the idea of breaking the Adulteration of Tea Act of 1776 started to seem a little frivolous.Lifting up this legal concrete slab in the garden of England, however, caused all sorts of creepy crawlies to emerge that began to cast doubt on the health of the nation, so Dan's adventure began to change tack. His journey ended up taking him all across the country where he found some unlikely heroes fighting back. Meet: Dorothy, who spent days living on the roof of a bus station in Derby a group of pensioners, who were forced to let off stink bombs in a court of law the man who dresses like Chaplin's tramp and keeps getting arrested outside Downing Street and, one woman who got an ASBO for being naked in her own home - and a Tourette's sufferer who was given an ASBO for swearing. So, whether it's fighting to protect our environment, our freedom, or the right to live in an unconventional way, I Fought the Law is an unashamedly patriotic call to arms to all those for whom enough is enough.

Author: Dan Kieran
Publisher: Transworld Publishers
ISBN: 9780553817706
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $27.95
Online Price:   $25.16

San Sombrero: A Land of Carnivals, Cocktails and Coups San Sombrero: A Land of Carnivals, Cocktails and Coups
Each year, more and more visitors are discovering the magic of San Sombrero, lured by its tropical charms, exotic lifestyle and lack of extradition treaties with the outside world. Proudly considered the birthplace of tinted sunglasses and sequins, this fascinating land is packed with things to see and do. Have your photo taken with a colourfully dressed ruhmero (drunk) while his accomplice steals your wallet. Sway to the steamy bababumba, one of the few dances in the world to routinely involve an exchange of body fluids. Try 'red water rafting' your way down a river of boiling lava. Or simply sit back and sip a molitivo cocktail while listening to the hypnotic rhythm of government helicopters strafing a nearby rebel stronghold. Crammed with expert advice, this fully updated guide contains everything the unsuspecting traveller needs to know about San Sombrero, Central America's forgotten jewel, including: WHEN TO GO - Despite the heat, April is considered a good option as the clouds of stinging hornets provide partial shade from the sun's rays.GETTING AROUND - Public transport can be confusing as the city displayed on the front of a bus is often not its destination but, in fact, the birthplace of its driver. EATING OUT - In restaurants, be wary of ordering a 'kids meal' - this will often involve baby goat.

Author: Tom Gleisner & Rob Sitch Santo Cilauro
Publisher: Hardie Grant Books
ISBN: 9781740663854
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $29.95
Online Price:   $26.96

Kerplunk! Kerplunk!
Patrick F. McManus's gently comic stories about outdoor life have earned him millions of fans worldwide. With Kerplunk!, McManus delivers a collection of folksy, wonderfully wise depictions of country life worthy of Mark Twain.

In these tall tales, McManus and his buddies learn how not to net a fish, why you should never get your hair cut by someone who's mad at you, what to do when a deer wanders into camp but your sleeping bag has frozen shut, and how to avoid bird-dog flatulence.

Traveling the highways and byways of the Pacific Northwest, the delightful backcountry characters of Kerplunk! understand how a life of hunting and fishing -- and its inherent potential for misadventure -- can resonate with larger meaning. McManus's characters know exactly why it costs $500 to make a fly lure that retails for $2 why installing a boat trailer hookup can lead to divorce and, most important, why you should always listen for the sound of your fishing line hitting the water -- because in life as it is in fishing, you don't know you're in the water until you hear the kerplunk!

These wry, curmudgeonly tales appeal to real outdoorsmen and the armchair variety alike. Often nostalgic, occasionally philosophical, and always funny, the stories in Kerplunk! reaffirm Patrick F. McManus's reputation as an American classic.


Author: Patrick F McManus
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
ISBN: 9780743280501
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $20.00
Online Price:   $18.00

Sixty Million Frenchmen Can't be Wrong Sixty Million Frenchmen Can't be Wrong
The French drink, smoke and eat more fat than anyone in the world, yet they live longer and have fewer heart problems than the English and the Americans. They work 35-hour weeks and take seven weeks' paid holiday each year, yet they are the world's fourth-biggest economic power. So how do they do it? From a distance modern France looks like a riddle. It is both rigidly authoritarian, yet incredibly inventive traditional (even archaic) yet modern lacking clout on the international stage yet still hugely influential. But with the observations, anecdotes and analysis of the authors, who spent nearly three years living in France, it begins to makes sense. 'Sixty Million Frenchmen Can't Be Wrong' is a journey into the French heart, mind and soul. This book reveals French ideas about land, food, privacy and language and weaves together the threads of French society, uncovering the essence of life in France and giving, for the first time, a complete picture of the French.

Author: Jean-Benoit Nadeau & Julie Barlow
Publisher: Anova Books
ISBN: 9781861057150
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $24.95
Online Price:   $22.46

Please Don't Touch the Celebrities! Please Don't Touch the Celebrities!
Written by two very sharp and successful assistants to HPPs (Hollywood Power Players), here are 99 lessons packed with a combination of blunt truth, insider humour, and juicy secrets that explain the unwritten rules of how to get a foot in the door and make all the right moves as you climb to the top. Here are the minimum-wage jobs that will put you in the path of HPPs. An annotated resume roundup. The clubs to frequent and the cocktails to order. Movies to watch and books to read (it's called homework). Dressing do's and don'ts. How to get on the Free List. A line up of boss genres - the Horror Show, the Romantic Comedy, Mr. Action - and how to dodge the tirades that will soon be hurled your way, along with the proper outlets for venting. Plus, the ins and outs of your most important tool, the telephone - when to listen in (always!), who to put through and who to put off, and your new best friend forever, the Plantronics CSSO cordless headset.With its hilariously snarky tone-the gate-keeping quiz is "How to Tell if You're a Moron Who Should Pack Up the Corolla and Move Back Home" - Please Don't Touch The Celebrities!" is as baldly entertaining for everyone who loves reading about Hollywood as it is indispensably practical for the job-seeker.

Author: Hillary Stamm & Peter Nowalk
Publisher: Workmans Publishing
ISBN: 9780761147466
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $22.95
Online Price:   $20.66

What Would Satan Do? What Would Satan Do?
In the author's own words - We like to think it's easy to know right from wrong. But in the heat of real-world moral decisions, things often arise to cloud our minds. Emotions, desires, talk radio. Perhaps it would be less difficult if we had better contemporary role models. After all, it may do to choose a car or hairstyle based on celebrity endorsements, but can you imagine the chaos if we modeled our everyday actions on them? Not even Jerry Springer could endure it. So we are told to consider, 'What would Jesus do?' But who the hell knows what he would do? If, on the other hand, we were to ponder, 'What would Satan do?' ah, now were talking. Answers start raining down like frogs in Egypt in that movie with Yul Brynner and Charlton Heston. But how is that any more useful than asking what celebrities would do? A compass that always points south can help you find your way as surely as one that points the other way. Likewise, a moral compass that always points to the wrong pole can be just as useful.

Author: Patricia Byrnes
Publisher: Harry N. Abrams, Inc.
ISBN: 9780810992436
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $24.95
Online Price:   $22.46

The Dictionary of Legal Bullshit The Dictionary of Legal Bullshit
This dictionary of legal terms looks to the plain-English meaning of all the words lawyers, judges and anyone else involved in our legal system feel compelled to use. It provides a humorous resource into this archaic and convoluted language and is sure to make anyone you know in the legal profession laugh out loud at its accurate absurdity. In The Dictionary of Legal Bullshit, you will find the definition of such words as:
Bankrupt. The state of being that one attains when the government sticks your creditors with the bill for your extravagant expenditures.
Jail. Exclusive public housing with lousy neighbors, no view, poor facilities and one of the highest cost per square foot of any living space ever built but with slightly less violence and fewer drug dealers than the public housing that is available to the populous at large.
Plus, find key Latin translations, like:
Res ipsa loquitor. Duh.
Res judicata. You lost, get over it.
Respondeat superior. Sue the one with the most money.

Author: Randall C Young
Publisher: Sphinx Publishing
ISBN: 9781572486362
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $22.95
Online Price:   $20.66

The Meaning of Liff The Meaning of Liff
In life and, indeed, in liff, there are many hundreds of common experiences, feelings, situations and even objects which we all know and recognize, but for which no words exist. This text uses place names to describe some of these meanings.

Author: Douglas Adams & John Lloyd
Publisher: Pan Macmillan
ISBN: 9780330281218
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $16.95
Online Price:   $15.26

The Complete Petrosexual The Complete Petrosexual
Few people realize that many dogs have a strong sense of style and innate good taste that goes beyond the dog dish. Dogs and their owners are about to be transformed by the narrator of the book and a dog's Virgil of the fashionista world, Sugar Magnolia. In her howlingly funny canine voice, Sugar gives fashion and lifestyle advice for transforming ordinary canines into modern petrosexuals - dogs of ultimate good breeding. From personal hygiene to commitment questions, dogs, and the humans who love them, will never be the same. Sample text in the section on eating - Human food? Too divine. Too easy to overindulge. A portly puppy is not a pretty puppy, so try to limit your intake. Be selective. A bit of cheese here, a morsel of ham there is really all you need. And just say no to chocolate. Chocolate is, alas, fatal for some dogs. Yes, it is true dear reader - chocolate can kill. You never know which dog it will strike or what the fatal quantity could be. One toxic truffle could be the end of you. There's plenty to eat without chocolate, trust me.

Author: Paint Chip Productions
Publisher: Stewart, Tabori & Chang Inc
ISBN: 9781584794332
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $24.95
Online Price:   $22.46

Chrismukkah Chrismukkah
Christmas meets Hanukkah for millions of mixed-faith families - who deck their trees with Stars of David and spin the dreidel under mistletoe. Here is a lavishly illustrated and endlessly entertaining guide to celebrating Chrismukkah, the merry mish-mash holiday. A veritable cornucopia of seasonal delights, this handy lifestyle guide walks us through the Chrismukkah events, history and lore. You'll learn about hybrid holiday traditions in decorating (ornaments, wreaths, menorahs, dreidels) innovative tchotchkes (Chrismukkah cards, stockings, lights) and a plethora of menorah options. Plus, the book includes rollicking games to play and songs to sing, along with easy-to-follow recipes for Latkes with Sugar Plum Fairy Sauce, General Saul's Chicken, Mama Mia Matzah Pizza! Your yuletide happy hours will never be the same once you start mixing a Yule Plotz, Meshugga Nog, or Manishewitz Mulled Wine. Rounding out the mix are chapters on snazzy holiday hats and caps, interfaith dog and cat gift suggestions, and office-party do's and don'ts. It's beginning to look a lot like Chrismukkah and now we'll all be ready to celebrate with style!

Author: Ron Gompertz
Publisher: Stewart, Tabori & Chang Inc
ISBN: 9781584795582
Format: Hardback Book
In Store Price:  $29.95
Online Price:   $26.96

Dadlands Dadlands
A baby has arrived. Now, your life is nothing but midnight feeds, crying, screaming and incontinence. And that's just you. But help is at hand with Dadlands. The author, a father of two, explores the secrets, hints, dodges and wheezes of being a first-time dad - and not having a nervous breakdown in the process. Read up on the best way to swear in front of toddlers, the perplexing variety of baby meals (just who invented Chicken Tikka Masala for 8-month-olds?) and the secrets of Toy Decommissioning. Learn the best tips for getting out of children's parties. See what happens if you call your child Chardonnay, and learn how to barge your way through a crowd with a pushchair. Find out why your kids need to come last in the egg-and-spoon race...and answer all those odd questions from non-parents who just don't understand. The ultimate antidote to all those worthy-but-dull parenting manuals, Dadlands finally tells it all like it is - the trials and tribulations of the first five years, from labour ward to Reception class. This book won't guarantee you'll become a Superdad, but it ought to help you have a lot of fun trying. An ideal book for all new fathers, fathers-to-be and their long-suffering partners.

Author: Daniel Blythe
Publisher: John Wiley and Son
ISBN: 9781841126791
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $22.95
Online Price:   $20.66

Idiots in Charge Idiots in Charge
Inside this collection, Gregory offers more than 250 accounts of bumbling bureaucrats on both sides of political party lines: -David Spellman became mayor of Black Hawk, Colorado on July 12, 2006, a week after pleading guilty to felony menacing and third-degree assault for pistol-whipping his wife with a handgun and firing three shots in 2005. -County officials in Vermillion, Indiana were told by state homeland security officials in July 2006 to stop using the special emergency-only highway message boards to advertise their charity fish fries and spaghetti dinners. -District 1 Town Councillor David Watson resigned from his position as council vice chairman on January 23, 2007, after unintentionally forwarding an e-mail to 18 members of the New Elementary School Building Committee. The e-mail contained nine embedded images of topless women under the heading 'This Is National Women's Breast Awareness Day.' The only other text in the e-mail read, 'Beats ...Martin Luther King Day, doesn't it?'

Author: Leland Gregory
Publisher: Andrews McMeel
ISBN: 9780740769702
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $18.95
Online Price:   $17.06

Very Naughty Mother Runs Away, the Very Naughty Mother Runs Away, the
Zed and Pink are a normal brother and sister except for one extremely strange thing their mum is a very naughty mother! In this side-splitting sequel to THE VERY NAUGHTY MOTHER GOES GREEN, we find the Very Naughty Mother back up to her old tricks. When she gets in trouble for hiding her brussel sprouts, she decides the best plan is to run away. So begins a hilarious series of adventures enhanced with line drawings by Zeke and Eppie, Gretel's children and the seasoned illustrators of the hit My Sister's series. This book will have you in stitches!

Author: Gretel Killeen
Publisher: Random House Publishers
ISBN: 9781740517645
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $14.95
Online Price:   $13.46

Is Your Cat Gay? Is Your Cat Gay?
If you've ever wondered if your fabulous feline friend was just a bit too fabulous...Here is a book that finally sheds light on the answer to the perennially puzzling question of your cat's sexual orientation. Funny and charming, it explores the 'tell-tail' signs to help cat lovers get in touch with their feline gaydar, with superb drawings by the NEW YORKER cartoonist Victoria Roberts in her trademark fun and witty style. The book finds revealing clues in all areas of cathood, including personality ('Is your cat a bit too catty?'), personal hygiene ('Does the litter tray smell suspiciously of Chanel No. 5?'), musical taste ('Why is Judy at Carnegie Hall always in the CD player?'), cat toys ('Keep your paws off his very special collection of Cher and Limited Edition Barbies'), accessories ('Does your cat insist on travelling in a custom Hermes carrier?') and more. Elegantly packaged, IS YOUR CAT GAY? is both stylish and amusing - a must-have for pet lovers and the purr-fect gift for anyone interested in the many lives and lifestyles of cats. Who knew?

Author: Charles Kreloff & Patty Brown,
Victoria Roberts

Publisher: Simon & Schuster
ISBN: 9780743264082
Format: Hardback Book
In Store Price:  $14.95
Online Price:   $13.46

I Love You, Man...But Not Like That I Love You, Man...But Not Like That
Two rules of guydom: Don't share feelings with your buddies, and never compliment a pal without insulting him at the same time.

I Love You Man . . . but Not Like That is a humorous collection of sentiments about male friendships that convey everything beer-drinking, sports-loving, macho men may want to say but never will. Most men figure, why share brotherly love when all you really want is for your buddy to share his beer? Its tongue-in-cheek, mock-heartfelt sayings are written the way men really talk.

Some man-to-man expressions of friendship:

Sure our friendship has passed the test of time, but could it ever pass a Breathalyzer? I often think about how much we've gone through together over the years . . . and the fact that most of it was your fault. I have to tell you, you've touched me . . . seriously. We were both really drunk, but I have a vague recollection of you touching me.Witty, emotionally distant, and universal to male friendships, I Love You Man . . . but Not Like That is something every man should give his buddyAif the big loser deserves it.


Author: Greg Seuss & D M Chapman
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 9780740760785
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $18.95
Online Price:   $17.06

The Five Jerks You Meet on Earth The Five Jerks You Meet on Earth
Al Mitchell is middle-aged, divorced, childless, balding, unemployed, stoop-shouldered, and deadAbut these are the least of his problems. When Mitchell dies in a chaotic merry-go-round wreck, he goes to Heaven hoping to discover the meaning of his sad-sack life by meeting the five most influential people he's known. But too bad they're busy meeting with more important people! In their place, Al meets his grade school lunch lady, family plumber, and a hairdresser who turned down all of his romantic advances. So much for peace in the afterlife!

Intent to make amends, Heaven's powers-that-be allow Mitchell to return to Earth (with help from a bumbling angel named Adrian) to achieve a goal even better than enlightenment. He gets to exact revenge on the five jerks who made his life so miserable!

Ray Zardetto's The Five Jerks You Meet on Earth hilariouslyAbut respectfullyAparodies Mitch Albom's The Five People You Meet in Heaven, It turns the premise of that inspiring best-seller on its headAand it speaks to the avenging loser in all of us!


Author: Ray Zardetto
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 9780740760822
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $19.95
Online Price:   $17.96

Idiots in Love Idiots in Love
Many people do crazy things in the name of love, but some people take things way too far. From failed seductions to botched proposals, from disturbing displays of affection to misguided marriages, Idiots in Love chronicles the stupid things falling in love (or falling out of it) can drive people to do: * A female Coca-Cola employee became engaged to a Pepsi employee, and Coke demanded that she break it off, persuade her fiance to leave Pepsi, or resign from Coca-Cola. She refused and was fired, but she later won a $600,000 settlement from the company. * A woman in Hardwick, Georgia, divorced her husband on the grounds that he 'stayed home too much and was too affectionate.' * A couple started divorce proceedings after 90 minutes of marriage. * A Norwegian woman hid a ring in her boyfriend's porridge to propose marriage to him, but he accidentally ate the ring. Fortunately, he accepted the proposal anyway. * In Whitesville, Delaware, it is illegal for a woman to propose to a man. * A European survey revealed that one in nine people admit to sending themselves Valentine's Day cards.Once again, Leland Gregory finds the absolute best and funniest anecdotes and one-liners that will have readers rolling with laughter at the amorous antics of idiots in love.

Author: Leland Gregory
Publisher: Andrews McMeel
ISBN: 9780740756696
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $18.95
Online Price:   $17.06

Feline Felons Feline Felons
Officers Reed and Malloy would certainly be interested in some of the sneakiest beasts to ever roam the metropolis, aka the FELINE FELONS. Bad cats, after all, are the current rage, and this book has the rap sheet on all the unusual suspects. Author Debbie Keller knows a bad kitty when she sees one. Her uncompromisingly funny book pairs candid photos of cats caught in the act with clever descriptions of their crimes. Even the occasional, Is this the face of a cat who would toss a guinea pig out a window? protestation crops up, too. This cat patrol blotter of feline crimes includes reports such as: Prowler - A midnight prowler was reported in the vicinity of garbage cans on trash day. Police artists have released this composite silhouette: Suspect is a middle-aged male, brown hair, yellow eyes, stocky build, 9 1/2 inches tall. Answers to the name of Here Kitty or the sound of an opening can. Adorable kitty cats do more than sleep in the sun. They're resting up after a night of no good ...and FELINE FELONS has Just the facts, ma'am.

Author: Debbie Keller
Publisher: Andrews McMeel
ISBN: 9780740757266
Format: Hardback Book
In Store Price:  $18.95
Online Price:   $17.06

The Girlfriends' Bible The Girlfriends' Bible
Every page of THE GIRLFRIENDS' BIBLE is filled with bits of humorous but inspirational encouragement that women and girlfriends of all ages will understand. * 'Yea, though you walk through the valley of cracked sidewalks in high heels, do not fear. For I will be there to pick you up when you fall on your ass.' * 'When you are heavy laden with PMS poundage, I will take your burden for you and deny thy girth.' * 'I shalt not steal your boyfriend, hairdo, or signature colour.' * When you get older, I shall forsake you not. For friends are like wine - the older, the better. You can get equally drunk with old or new wine. But intoxication with old wine is far more pleasurable.' * 'If your cup runneth over because your bra is too small and you look like a common whore, I will tell you, just as you would tell me about a visible panty line.' Friendship between women is sacred, and THE GIRLFRIENDS' BIBLE is filled with hilarious 'scriptures' that women can and do live by. This book will help every woman tell her best gal pal how valuable their friendship is.

Author: Cathy Hamilton
Publisher: Andrews McMeel
ISBN: 9780740743412
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $18.95
Online Price:   $17.06

Paris the Heiress Paris the Heiress
Model, actress, socialite, home-movie enthusiast, reality TV sensation and, oh yes, heir to the Hilton hotel fortune, Paris Hilton does it all, has it all, and occasionally shows it all. The perfect celebrity for this vacuous age, young Ms. Hilton is most famous for, well, simply being famous. In the past year, Paris has maintained her A-list celebrity status by starring in a B-grade, common-folk-mocking reality show, The Simple Life, and by directing, choreographing, and starring in an X-rated video widely distributed over the Internet. Paris is definitely burning. Now you can share all the fun, fashion, glitz, and glamour with Paris the Heiress: A Paris Hilton Paper Doll Book. Dress her up Accessorize Stage your own little tragicomedy with the up-and-coming queen of all media. Sure, Paris has done the down-on-the-farm bit, but with the outfits in this book you can really stretch her repertoire. Why not Paris as brain surgeon, biker chick, or even (quel horreur ) overweight suburban housewife? The Paris Hilton Paper Doll Book comes complete with two 10-inch-tall, perforated paper dolls and a whole closet full of outfits the living doll would not be caught dead in. Fashions come and go, but as Rick told Ilsa in Casablanca We'll always have Paris.

Author: Patrick Regan,
Steven Chorney

Publisher: Andrews McMeel
ISBN: 9780740748080
Format: Paperback Book
In Store Price:  $22.95
Online Price:   $20.66

 

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